My dad owns over a million dollars of property in Chicago. You might think the property taxes are pretty expensive for so much real estate, but for my family, that’s not really the case. See, Dad just appeals his assessments with Godfather  Joe’s office. He’s gotten over ten reductions on his properties since 2012. Here’s the one I’m most proud of (the pic isn’t too clear, but we went from a $56k assessment down to $31k):

They tried to raise the assessment back up to $41k in 2015, but Joe came through for us again. We got it back down to $32k:

Know who’s missing? Me! I used to work for his daughter, State Rep. Toni Berrios. But she lost her election in 2014, so I really could use another government job. Thank goodness Padrino Joe is going to buy me a State Senate seat!

Hi friends:

You might know my godfather, Cook County Assessor Joe Berrios.  He’s been a great benefactor to our families, from putting them on county payroll to giving Dad some nice tax break on his properties. (That was especially helpful so Dad could give me a $75,000 loan for my failed alderman campaign.)

Now it’s my turn to get a cush government job too! You can help keep the 2nd senate district seat safely in the hands of the Berrios political machine by voting for me.

Sincerely,

Omar “Machine-O” Aquino